It’s been a while since I’ve written, and it’s all because I’ve been so ti(r)ed up! Sharing just a summary of it here… believe me, a lot more happened.
So I was saying I would share more on why I shipped Kaitlyn off to preschool at the tender age of 21 months. With Joshua, I was a SAHM for his first 2 years, then enrolled him in preschool after he turned 2. For Kaitlyn, I had no choice as this time I was a single mom with a solo income, so I had to work.
While I am grateful for the 3 months adoption leave that gave me time to bond with her first, it also left me with the dilemma on what to do once I had to return to work. After much thought, I decided to engage a domestic helper (instead of putting her in infant care) to help out with looking after Kaitlyn while managing the household cleaning.
It had never crossed my mind to engage a helper. I’m rather a control freak when it comes to how my home is cleaned. But in this case, I had to. And having a stranger in our home was also not easy.
Long story short, this helper started out obedient and hardworking, albeit a bit blur. As time went on, it was clear she was getting lazy, displaying more attitude, and as Kaitlyn got older and more mobile, the helper obviously had no control over an active tot. With multiple incidents of Kaitlyn getting into mischief, like covering herself entirely in Sudocrem, or pulling out all the wet wipes and nappy bags, to stripping herself down to her diaper and smearing poo 💩all over the sheets and wall! 😫 So because of all these, the helper took to keeping Kaitlyn restrained at most times.
The poo ones were too dirty to post 😳~
Now, I had installed cameras around my home and whenever I checked in, I’d see Kaitlyn strapped to her highchair, or stuck in the crib. I literally caught on camera once, when Kaitlyn had her face leaning on her hand in a totally bored look (see below). While it seemed amusing, it was very worrying indeed. Here was a toddler who showed such curiousity and eagerness to play and learn, but the helper provided no stimulation whatsoever, and could be seen sitting in the kitchen staring into space when not cooking or cleaning.
The helper’s character did a 180-degree turn the moment she got involved with someone romantically. She didn’t know I found out, and would be on the phone past midnight giggling away while Kaitlyn was asleep. This went on despite my warnings.
It was due to this disturbing behavior, and lack of interaction and stimulation that I decided to enroll Kaitlyn in preschool earlier, so she could be engaged and meet new friends too. Hence, I embarked on my preschool hunt for her. You can read about it here.
Anyway, to update on Kaitlyn at school, all was going great but then something happened and I had to pull her out of the preschool and enroll her in another. Talk about another stressful event! 😓Luckily I was able to find another which could take her in within a month, and the school had a warm and conducive environment, with small teacher:child ratio, clean and well thought-out classroom layout. The teachers seemed friendly and caring, and the admin staff were very helpful too. I knew that Kaitlyn would settle in just fine.
The reason why? Cos she is a girl who is excited to learn, and with a personality that just loves meeting new people. 👧🏻She is a very affectionate child who would say ‘Hello’ and ‘Bye’ to complete strangers, and even go up to hug a person she just met. This makes me worry at times, especially when you hear about abductions etc… So I just need to keep a watchful eye 👁 on her, and educate her on when it is safe and when she needs to be more wary. Best is to say: Just follow Mommy!
Well, this preschool was weird in only one aspect — they insisted that the first week would be on a half-day basis, meaning the child could only come in during the morning and leave after lunch. I explained my situation and had to use my persuasive skills to get the principal to change her mind. My rationale: my girl loves going to school and, as her mother, I was confident she would adapt well. If I were to start the precedent of picking her up at noon, it may become a routine and settling her for a full day may be tougher after. Also, I needed her to be in full-day care as soon as possible as I was going to dismiss my helper whose behaviour had gotten to the point she would rudely talk back to me and my family was at the mercy of her mood swings.
Needless to say, Kaitlyn settled in nicely and even amazed her new class teacher with how well she took to school. In fact, the first time she met Ms Tang, she immediately gave her a hug. Not to mention, her squeal of delight to see me whenever I pick her up at the end of the day. No tears!
You go, Kaitlyn!! Mommy knew you could do it, and I know that you’ll have an amazing learning journey at school with your teachers and friends! 😊
P/S: Oh yeah, so I am now without a helper, and have had to get back to the routine of housecleaning and cooking with a tot and teen in tow. It’s been tiring, especially since I had to reclaim my kitchen and fix up everything the helper ‘destroyed’ or poorly maintained.
And Joshua has taken up new duties in his stride, helping out with the mopping and dishwashing, hanging laundry and some cleaning. 👦🏻💕Meanwhile, lil Miss K just happily follows us around the house and chattering away in her baby gibberish!
All children start their school careers with sparkling imaginations, fertile minds, and a willingness to take risks with what they think.
Ken Robinson
